Last year I was a poor American. I would just call it two year except that I escaped to Africa for the last part of the second. I was lucky that my mother took it upon herself to continue to feed me even though I wasn’t living at home, but other than that I had a very hard time. This started when I returned from a vacation to Hawaii and found 90% of what I had in my apartment had been stolen. All that the thieves left were my surround sound system because it was too much work to take probably and my golf clubs that were hidden in the basement. My best friend Eric, aka E row, lived really close to me so right after leaving my luggage at my place I went and told him about it. I couldn’t be there. I had just gone from a lavish family vacation where we were blowing all of the mileage and hotel points my dad had built up to being as upset and pissed off as I have ever been. After that I got in Eric’s car and he drove us to a bible study and I remember really well the joke that he made, which turned into a trick because I went along with it, he actually had people believing that my bed was taken. The next week I was scammed into buying a sound system that was supposed to cost 1800 for 250 dollars but was really worth about 100. So right after I lost most of the things that I had spent my money on I wasted more with the idea that I could get them back (I was hoping to sell the sound system on the internet to make some kind of profit). I soon after applied to the Peace Corps and when I realized how selfish I was and how prideful I was of the things I had. But I was by no means done learning this lesson.
After graduating from college I got a job working as an independent contractor for Dan. I liked working for Dan although I did hate roofing, but that was only because it was hard work. This lasted for three weeks until Dan dropped a downspout that sliced into my thumb. This is when I found out for real that my health insurance was gone and how much I use my thumb because it was three weeks before it healed (independent contractors do not get insurance provided for them or work man’s compensation). After returning to work I told Dan that I no longer had insurance so he fired me. The money that I made working for Dan held me off from July till September when I found a job working for another contractor Rich who didn’t care that I didn’t have insurance. I worked on and off for him for about six weeks. He told me the story of when he was growing up which puts this one to shame. At the same time I had met someone who told me that they would hire me to tutor math at a high school not too far from my apartment. All that I had to do was receive child abuse clearance. I applied for this clearance in September and waited until the end of December before it came. So I started that job in early January 2010.
I felt like such a loser when I couldn’t pay the rent because my tutoring job didn’t pay me for two and a half months. It was just as bad that I couldn’t pay my roommates for the gas, electricity or cable. I remember when my bank account hit zero was when I was paying for my vaccinations to get medically cleared to join the Peace Corps. I went into the bathroom of the clinic and cried. Then I walked to the office of my friend Greg and prayed and cried some more. My life was so filled with uncertainty. I was counting on the Peace Corps to accept me, but everything they sent me just made me more uncertain that I would ever get my invitation. The following Sunday I went to a different church than I usually go to for service, but I did attend Bible study there, because I was volunteering there after the service with my bible study to give away lunch to the homeless. I was sitting in the pew with about 27 dollars in my pocket and negative two on my credit card and 25000 in loan debt and no income to speak about. And I felt God speak to me. He told me to put the money in my pocket into the offering. I then convinced myself that I shouldn’t do that though so God told me to go home to my parents’ house and break my piggy bank that I had completely forgotten about. My mom had mentioned this piggy bank to me on one of our grocery shopping trips but I blew her off partly because I didn’t want to count it or pay to have someone else count it for me. I finally got over my pride and counted it. There was nearly 600 dollars in it that I had been collecting since I was in elementary school so I could settle at least most of my debt with my friends all in quarters, nickels and dimes. Once I was paid I didn’t just sit on it either like I had done for all of the other jobs I have ever had. I tithed immediately because I felt bad that I hadn’t given when God told me to. I also called up friends that I hadn’t seen in a while to get lunch with them and tell them I had gotten my Peace Corps invitation.
The next thing I knew I had gotten a job working for the census, which paid well. I only worked for them for seven weeks but that was enough for me to ride on until I left for Rwanda.
I was living in fear and I hated it. I imagine that this is a lot like what Rwandans go through. I had a lot of people who bailed me out of my misery by either taking my word that I would pay them back or by giving me handouts out of the goodness of their heart. These handouts include the time amazing friends who I lived with or hung out with, and of course my family continuing to buy me the food I wanted. And one thing that I remember specifically was when Greg took me to the AFC championship game between the Steelers and Ravens, which was followed by the Steelers winning the Superbowl. That happened the weekend after I bought the junk stereo system. I had a conversation with Magnum who was my roommates through all of this right before leaving for Rwanda. He said to me that he knew how hard this time was for me, but he hoped that I would remember all of the fun we had together, and while I was unemployed he could always count on me to be home to hang out or talk to. He more than anyone else except maybe me, noticed a change in my behavior and Maturity. During this time was when I realized for the first time what Jesus meant by you cannot serve two masters and to not worry about tomorrow. This is why I think that I like it when Rwandans say be patient to each other. I know that God put me through this period of suffering so that I could become more of the person he wants me to be. Difficult periods are parts of life and all we can is be patient because for everything there is a season.
For the Rwandans who tell me that I am rich I give them the facts. I try to be completely transparent about it. I tell them that I have 20000 dollars in debt (my parents paid for some of it but that is only because they had told me they would and I was using their word as leverage for things like getting them to agree to the Peace Corps that they would take care of my loans while I was serving and cosigning a lease for me which they never did anyways and another one of my roommates had to sign in my place. I am not bitter about these things and I am grateful that they paid for so much of my college tuition. I have forgiven them for any and every way they have ever hurt me. I do love my parents. I know that I am just another prodigal son anyways). I tell them my monthly salary here. (I don’t usually tell the students this though). It is a lot less than what they all think I am making. A student at the school thought I was making 40000 dollars a month. I told him my actual salary and his response was “I cannot accept!” By this response I can tell that I am not rich by Rwandan standards either, but I am not living in poverty either. I have also told people that my life was harder in America than it is here in Rwanda and I get the same response. I respond to that with “Have you been there, how do you know?” but that doesn’t really change their minds. This last statement still might be difficult to agree with if you know both Rwanda and America, but I have a different perspective of both than most do I think.
This is me with my teaching staff on our school picnic out to Gisenyi. This picture was taken in Musanze though
Gisenyi is right on the Lake Kivu. Notice how everyone is looking at me.
The view of a mist filled valley from Byumba.
Taking the water buffalo by the horns. It’s a metaphor but it really happened. I would love to get a picture of me doing this for real but I haven’t worked up the courage/been stupid enough to go through with it yet.
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