The rest of your life

Yesterday was the graduation ceremony at my school. There was singing, dancing traditional and modern hip-hop, concessions and speeches. Being there just made me think of my own graduations. Graduation from high school was great. I was so ready to move out and go to college. Graduation from college however was not that great. It just felt like something great was ending. I was never scared that I would not graduate. I didn’t really care about what my GPA was either. I just went through the motions of finishing my degree. I had nothing lined up for me, but I had friends who did. They were going to grad school or had found a job. All I had done was apply to the Peace Corps. I was happy for my friends and enjoyed the last moments of being a college student with them, but I was also surrounded by a cloud of uncertainty.

I think that these students that are finishing secondary school might feel similar to how I felt after college. I’m sure a few of them have something planned, but most of them probably do not. A lot of them will simply be unemployed, which is worse than the condition I was in. At least I had something that I had applied to, which I am now doing.

I asked some of them what they will do now and they don’t know. The common response is they will look for a job. My favorite graduating senior said she will sell clothes at the market. A decent job, but she is capable of so much more.

Only 1% of the country goes to university and if these students want to do that they will have to save up a little before they can go. Getting a loan is not really an option and support is really hard to come by. Something the president of the parents association said while giving his speech was, ‘You say education is expensive, but how about ignorance.’ I agree with him. The cost of ignorance is greater than education, but this doesn’t change that most of these recent grads will not continue their education and it is not because they are ignorant.

Something else he said was a public thank you to me. I have never spoken to him, but someone must have told him about what I do or he felt compelled to say this after I got my own introduction at the beginning of the ceremony apart from the other teachers. He thanked America, the Peace Corps and me for what I do. He then told me to extend their gratitude to the Peace Corps and America, so to any Americans or anyone from Peace Corps reading this the parents of students of Mulindi Secondary thank you. This was the first time I have been thanked since being sworn in as a volunteer, and then it was as a group. I teared up a little when he said this and quickly wiped it away. The headmaster spoke after him and he thanked me too.

I usually don’t feel too appreciated. It is so hard to really gage what they think of me. Do they really need me? Do they really want the help I am here to give? Am I getting more out of being here than I am giving? Is what I am doing sustainable or will it be like I was never here? I am here because I want to find meaning in my life.

As a senior in college I studied Ecclesiastes in two bible studies at the same time. I had been going to both for a while already so when both decided to study Ecclesiastes at the same time I was a little disappointed, but kept going to both of them anyways. Ecclesiastes is a great book. Solomon is traditionally credited with writing it because he fits the character. The book can be summarized into one line that it repeats multiple times. ‘Everything underneath the sun is meaningless.’ In the end it is not going to matter if you have done everything you wanted, lived a good life, worked hard, or acquired knowledge. It is all chasing the wind. There nothing more uplifting and promising than studying the bible. Then again the bible was never supposed to be uplifting. Solomon comes to the conclusion that there is nothing better for a person to do than ‘be joyful and to do good as long as they live,’ and only what God does lasts forever and God does these things so people will accept and love/fear him. The man who turned away from God in so many ways then writes a book about why you should not turn away from God, and it’s not because of your place in eternity but because you will never find meaning in anything else, but you should still enjoy life.

Graduating from school forces you to ask what you are going to do with your life, but I guess you never stop asking that question. Even as an old man who had done everything life had to offer Solomon was still contemplating this. Three thousand years there is still not an answer. I am here doing what I am doing this because I want to do good, but I want so many more things than to do good. I want the experience and everything that I can get out of it. I guess that’s how I’m trying to enjoy life.

I let a teacher use my camera during the ceremony. He was a lot more interested in recording video than taking pictures so I don’t have many good pictures of the evening. I can’t upload videos. This is of the student council.

We are taking pictures so everyone look serious.

I posed for about 100 pictures. My friend Simon told me how “gay” we looked after we took this one. He then told me that we got married and that I was the bride because the other guy was wearing a suit.

The only picture I got with my favorite of the graduating class, Aline the president of GLOW club, and the top of my head is cut off. I am going to miss her being around. I can have a favorite. I’m their teacher not their dad.

Simon and Aline both have so much potential if they were given the opportunity.

The rest of the pictures he took were pretty blurry. I’m pretty tired of them always taking my camera from me. I don’t think I will allow it any more.